R.

Sorry for the lag! So much has happened, and to be honest I don't even know where to start.

But in everything that has happened leading up to today, I found a reoccurring theme that has really set myself to be excited for life.

In January, I found myself completely in love with God again. It started at the leaders training in Melbourne where I couldn't help but see the beauty in everyone I met because they loved God so much. And after 3-4 days of pride, fear and unworthiness - I finally gathered the courage to make the most honest confession with a priest I've never seen/met before. Lucky I was the only one left, I was there for a while lol. But in that, I realized I could really love God wholeheartedly again because I started to love myself again. How can we love others, and love God if we can't see Him in our own hearts? That's what I kept thinking to myself before reconciliation. And praise God because it was the best and scariest thing I've done within 20ish years of my life.

In February, I found love in my anointing and mission area of YFC NSW. In this month alone, I discovered that true love is in total surrender to someone else - something that's so hard to express to God, and usually brought me to my knees in worships at SHOUT especially with such a crazy mission ahead!
I also found love in rest! After being completely exhausted mentally and physically injured, I experienced a state of peace - lying in bed, being content with all that had already happened in the first two months of 2012.

In March, I found love in my HH. Both the biological and service kind. I found love in my friendships, the ones who have always been there despite the big intervals since last seeing eachother, the ones who never fail to make me cry of laughter; the ones who remind me that yeah life is busy, but life is also always beautiful because of these people.

It's all about love. And i'm more than happy for that to be my sole purpose for living. Or soul purpose ;) see what I did there. Haha. And in witnessing one of my closest, most trustworthy and Christ-like friend being enagaged and so in love! ... It makes me so kiligs to trust and to wait for who God has planned for me. I have no idea what kind of girlfriend I'll be, but what I do know is that God will be the love between us. And that's pretty legit in terms of eternity, faithfulness and joy. A friend told me to read 1Cor13:4-7, y'know the typical love verse... but to do more than that and replace the word 'love' with his [future] name. And that's still exciting :) even if there's noone to put in there atm and if God-willing that's my vocation.